A perinatal mood and anxiety disorder (PMAD) is a mental health condition that affects many new mothers during pregnancy or in the first year after childbirth. Symptoms can range from anxiety, depression, and irritability, to overwhelming feelings of guilt or isolation. As a partner, understanding how to support your loved one through this challenging time is crucial for their recovery and well-being.
Supporting someone with a PMAD can be a difficult journey, but it is also an incredibly important role. Knowing how to provide the right kind of support can make all the difference in their healing process. In this blog, we’ll share 5 ways you can support your partner if they’re struggling with a PMAD, ensuring that you’re there for them physically, emotionally, and mentally during this challenging period.
1. Educate Yourself About PMADs
Understanding what your partner is going through is essential. PMADs can take various forms, including postpartum depression (PPD), postpartum anxiety (PPA), and even postpartum OCD or psychosis. The more you educate yourself, the better equipped you will be to support your partner’s emotional and physical needs.
How to Do It:
- Read up on different types of PMADs, their symptoms, and treatments.
- Learn about the emotional and physical effects these disorders can have on your partner, including how it may affect their ability to bond with the baby.
- Encourage your partner to speak to a healthcare provider about their symptoms, but don’t pressure them.
Why It Works:
When you understand what your partner is experiencing, you’re better able to offer empathy and patience. This knowledge also helps reduce any confusion or frustration that may arise as a result of the mood swings or behavior changes linked to PMADs.
2. Listen and Validate Their Feelings
One of the most important things you can do is listen to your partner without judgment. Many people with PMADs feel isolated or misunderstood, so it’s essential to create a safe, non-judgmental space where your partner feels comfortable expressing themselves.
How to Do It:
- Let your partner talk about their feelings and experiences without interrupting or offering immediate solutions.
- Use phrases like “I hear you,” “That sounds really tough,” or “I’m so sorry you’re feeling this way” to validate their emotions.
- Avoid minimizing their feelings by saying things like “It’s not that bad” or “Just think positive.”
Why It Works:
Validation fosters emotional connection and helps your partner feel heard and understood. Knowing they are not alone can make a huge difference in their mental health and can alleviate some of the feelings of isolation common with PMADs.
3. Offer Practical Help
PMADs can make even simple daily tasks overwhelming. Offering help with household chores, childcare, or other responsibilities can relieve some of the pressure and give your partner time to focus on their mental health and recovery.
How to Do It:
- Take on daily chores, such as laundry, cooking, or cleaning, without being asked.
- Help with baby care, especially during nighttime feedings or when your partner needs rest.
- Offer to run errands, prepare meals, or take care of other responsibilities so your partner can relax or attend therapy sessions.
Why It Works:
Practical support can give your partner the space they need to recover. By lightening their load, you allow them to focus on their mental and emotional health without the added stress of managing everything at once.
4. Encourage Professional Help and Self-Care
If your partner is struggling with a PMAD, professional treatment is often the best path to recovery. Encourage your partner to seek help from a mental health professional, whether it’s a therapist, counselor, or psychiatrist. It’s also essential to support them in prioritizing self-care.
How to Do It:
- Gently encourage them to seek therapy or counseling, and offer to help them make appointments or go with them if they’re hesitant.
- Encourage small acts of self-care, like taking a warm bath, getting outside for a walk, or sleeping when possible.
- Respect their decision if they’re not ready to seek professional help, but continue to offer support and understanding.
Why It Works:
PMADs can be treated, and professional help is crucial in the recovery process. Encouraging your partner to take care of themselves not only aids their recovery but also reinforces that their mental health is just as important as their physical health.
5. Be Patient and Compassionate
Recovery from a PMAD takes time, and there will be ups and downs. There may be moments of frustration or setbacks, but patience and compassion are key to navigating this journey together. Your partner needs your love and support, even when it feels challenging.
How to Do It:
- Remain patient with your partner as they navigate their recovery journey.
- Show compassion when they feel down or overwhelmed, and offer reassurance that they are not failing.
- Recognize that recovery can take time and progress may be slow, but every step counts.
Why It Works:
Patience and compassion help reduce feelings of shame or guilt your partner might feel, which are often associated with PMADs. It’s important to remind them that healing is a process, and they don’t have to go through it alone.
Conclusion
Supporting your partner through a PMAD can be challenging, but it’s also an incredibly rewarding and meaningful role. By educating yourself, listening to their feelings, offering practical help, encouraging professional support, and showing patience and compassion, you can be an essential source of comfort and strength.
Remember, PMADs are treatable, and with the right support, your partner can heal and regain their sense of self. Be there for them in whatever way they need, and don’t forget to care for yourself as well, as supporting someone with a PMAD can also take a toll on you. Together, you can work through this challenging time and come out stronger on the other side.
